Wednesday, July 01, 2009
They Call Her Blessed
This is a re-posting of an article I wrote for Mother's Day 2003. Mom really appreciated it and had asked that it be included as part of her funeral service. As things transpired, it wasn't, there was, in our family's opinion, a much more appropriate statement needed.
In tribute to Mom, on this what would have been her 81st birthday, I'm again offering it for review. Mom, as the first time, this is offered in love to honor, and now remember, the person you were.
Nearly 75 (can you believe it!) years ago a little girl was born to T.O and Edna Evans in the small southern village of Darlington, South Carolina. She was the 9th (I think) of what would be 12 children to this Pentecostal Holiness preacher and his wife. They supported his ministry and their family by farming cotton in the post-depression and World War II south.
This little girl, Mildred they called her, found joy on the farm as she grew and matured in the shadow of her strong willed father, nurtured by her gentle mother and guided by her sister Ruth. Millie loved to please her brothers and believed anything they told her, even to the point of jumping from the hayloft, flapping her arms as she tried to fly like her brothers told her she could.
Her childhood was filled with days in the fields, evenings playing with the imaginations of a farm child, cold nights warmed by hot bricks, and field trips which included natures call to the outhouse out back. The kitchen was filled with the aromas of the farm bounty and the tables filled with the wonders of the visitations of traveling preachers and missionaries. As she grew up, she grew strong in character and will and when the time came she was sent to school in Greenville. It was there she met her love, her promise, in the person of Bill and in time they were married.
After the wedding in June 1950 they headed out into the ministry armed with the surety of their calling and the adventure and abandon of youth on a mission. In just under 10 months, despite the best efforts of "the book", their first born, Billie came into the world. As they continued to minister and travel, a few short years later a second, Steve came along and they decided that a family needed a place to call home so they entered the pastorate, ministering first in Oklahoma, then Illinois, Missouri, Iowa and back to the Carolinas.
As life and God carried them on, she grew strong in her faith and sure in her virtue. A third son, Dan came in Oklahoma, and a daughter, Jana, in Illinois. Through the struggles of life, the loss of her beloved parents and in-laws, the financial setbacks, the toil and joy of raising a family, she never lost her trust in God, her determination and strength of will.
The loss of her first born, Billie, was heartache. Yet still in that heartache, she saw God's love and lessons to be learned and lessons to be shared. Neither gall bladder nor oral surgery would take her smile. A heart attack and subsequent bypass surgery would not diminish her love of life. Knee replacement would not stop her from running the race of life and eye surgery did not diminish her ability to see the best in others.
As she raised her children, she always loved them, even when they failed to follow her guidance. As they struck out on their own, she continued to love and support, encourage and comfort as they to struggled with life, trying to find themselves and finally finding God on the road to destruction. Lifting them up in prayer, counseling and supporting and loving and admonishing as they married and failed in marriage. Married and won in marriage then lost in death that beloved spouse. They struggled with the imponderables of life and living and not just knowing about God, but knowing God…and truly finding Him. Her children knew that Millie would always love them, and pray for them, laugh with them and cry with them. Give, and sacrifice, and hold and support and never fail to be honest with them, even when it hurt. Because even in the hurt, there is love.
Even now as she approaches 75, Millie is still giving to her family. She works so that the healthcare costs don't ravage the retirement of her beloved and herself. She, in spite of her own bodily struggles, gives more than she physically has to help and care for her children and grandchildren. Does she complain? Perhaps some, but rarely to anyone other than her Lord. She simply puts on a smile and keeps moving forward, loving and living.
Has she lived a wonderful, exciting, successful life. Many would look and say, "not really." But they don't measure with the same stick as her friends, family and most importantly her Lord. She has the joy of a life well lived, she has four children who love the Lord and honor her, one who has attained the goal. She has a husband who worships her, loves her, adores her and would give all he has and all he is for her. In the words of Solomon in Proverbs 31:
10 A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 "Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
31 Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
Mom, the words of Proverbs were written about you. No, you are not perfect in all things, but you are perfectly...MOM.
"We are all in the same boat on a stormy sea and
we owe each other a terrible loyalty." - G. K. Chesterson
Labels: character, family, hero, Millie, Mom, prayer, tribute, values
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Giving thanks...
Eph 5:20 "Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;" (KJVA)
If you’re reading this Thanksgiving Day, I was scheduled to work today, but flexibility being the watchword, that has changed, YEAH!!.
I had originally planned to be off this week and was considering making the trek to be with my parents and siblings this day, that or spend the week working on a failed shower pan.
Well, things didn’t work out where I would be able to work on and complete the shower, but neither was I able to make the pilgrimage north. One of our employee’s heart problems revisited and for the second time in 3 weeks he had to undergo a cardiac stent procedure.
With the downsizing the Postal Service is undergoing, we no longer have the redundancy of employees for which the service was once legitimately criticized. That redundancy is no longer the case and the reductions continue with voluntary early retirements taking effect in January ’09.
Two strong healthy people can distribute mail in our office for a short period of time, I know because I did it the first time this employee went into the hospital. But now, if I were to take the time off, the two people left are both near or past retirement and neither are in the best of health themselves. Attempting to run the office for a week would most likely, for them, result in their needing to take sick leave to recover from the physical damage they’d incur.
So, I find myself working this week, the first time I would have had Thanksgiving week off in 20 years of working for the Postal Service. Additionally, the little known secret is that even though there is no window service or mail delivery on a holiday, many larger offices still must staff to one degree or another otherwise the mail the following day would be overwhelming and most likely delays would occur.
However, with the overwhelming changes occurring in the Postal Service, we are downsizing our staffing across the board and extending dependency on automation processes to increase productivity and further reduce staffing.
The Postal Service is not immune to the shrinking economy. Our business depends on mail volume and that volume is dropping. Many factors come into play, the rise of the Internet and electronic billing and remittance being primary.
We learned Wednesday that except in the major processing centers, there will no transportation running to delivery offices on Thanksgiving Day and thus no need to provide even minimal staffing in those office. I have no doubt that this seeming minor change will save millions of dollars in avoided costs on this holiday.
And with that additional bit of knowledge, I no longer am required to work this Thanksgiving Day, and that's a good thing.
So, with all this change and uncertainty am I complaining, Nope. I’m thankful. Thankful for so many things. Thankful for my job. It’s been a source of income security for 20 years and provided for my family in many ways.
I’m thankful for my family. For their love and patience with me, even in those times when I challenge their patience.
For my parents, for their nurture, their provision, their guidance, their love. For being an example to follow and a source of strength in times of trial. For their expression of love and in doing so were an example of God’s love to me.
For my brother and sister. I left home before we developed those close relationships so often depicted in film and book. But then, I’m a different kind of independent individual and those kind of relationships would be difficult for me to maintain for any length of time. Still, I know their love is secure and when I have needed their support, they have been there for me, without fail.
For my wife, Karen. For the same reasons listed above, I’m not an easy person to live with. I can often be distant, quite, uncommunicative, and stubborn and sometimes exhibit unloving behavior. Still, she is patient and continues to love me, even after these past 8 years of ups and downs. She really deserves a medal.
I’m thankful for my health. The past two years has really brought this home with the cycling accident I had in February ’06 and the subsequent two surgeries. The long rehabilitation and just in the past few weeks returning to my bike. It’s a joy to be able to physically challenge myself. Many my age are unable to do so, their bodies failing them either due to genetics or abuse.
I’m thankful for my home. Yes, even with the damaged shower. Our home is a blessing and a refuge. In the six years since we built we’ve realized it is probably too small for this time in our lives and there are things I miss, like a two-car garage. But many have no garage, live in an overcrowded home with several generations under one roof and, recently, a significant percentage of homeowners are losing their home. Some due to imprudent financial decisions, some simply victims, oh how I hate those words, of our present economy.
I’m thankful for our grandchildren. Don’t see ‘em often enough, and frankly, when we do I’m often ready for their parents to pick ‘em up before their parents are ready to do so. Still, Camron and Katie are great kids, healthy, active, energetic, imaginative, inquisitive and intelligent. What more could you ask for.
I’m thankful for technology, though sometimes I’d like to take that technology and toss it out the window. Technology helps keep us closer. Families that would barely know each other develop cyber-relationships when there would have been little contact otherwise. Some of you are reading this on Facebook where I have recently had the pleasure to reconnect with friends thought lost years ago.
Speaking of those friends, I’m thankful for each of you. The imprint you’ve had on my life is indelible and while some more than others, each friendship and relationship has served to mold and shape me in ways that has made me the person I am.
Most of all I’m thankful for the love, grace and mercy of a loving God who really does love me. Some folks think of God as a stern, judgmental, unforgiving master who seeks their obedience, respect and fear. The God I know loves me; he really does, and seeks his best for my life. It’s my duty to seek out his will and conform my life to it, not out of fear but out of love and devotion to him.
So on this Thanksgiving Day, as I work, I will do so with thanksgiving in my heart and a song on my lips. For I truly have much to be thankful for.
"We are all in the same boat on a stormy sea and
we owe each other a terrible loyalty." - G. K. Chesterson
Labels: family, friends, holidays, Postal Service, Thanksgiving